I have a small plastic barrel with waterlilies that grow in my backyard. All year long, I see the lily pads on the surface of the water as they spring from below. One after the other, these small yellow-green disks flourish around the barrel. But once a year, there is a magical and special ocurrence. It happens only once a year that a lotus bud emerges from the waters and a flower with blush pink and red-violet hues blooms. It is one of the most beautiful encounters to witness. From the muddy waters, this flower with all its intricate petals and colors is born and reborn. Something interesting about this flower is that it only opens up during the morning and mid-day and closes around the afternoon and night back into the bud; only to open up again the next day.
For these reasons, I relate to the waterlilies especially with the pop-up markets I've been dedicating my time to. I show up, I educate, entertain, inform, talk for hours, stay silent, I reflect and then after selling my art, I pack up and go home. I seep into the pond floor again and wait until the next weekend to do it all over again. But then thing is, the lotus flower blooms ONCE A YEAR! I had to continue blooming a whole year until I felt like my body and spirit gave up around last month. As I had just turned a year old as a seller of all things payasines, guaterlilis and melancholy, I felt an exhaustion like never before. I was tired of making art non-stop and spreading myself so thin, testing my resilience. Turns out even I have a breaking point. So, I took a break. Actually.. I'm still on a somewhat break. I finalized a painting in these weeks but I took a break from making art for markets and distanced myself from the local scene atleast physically, not that anyone noticed. But attending markets nonstop made me feel as appreciated but somewhat unfulfilled. I can't say I know what I am looking for but I don't want to feel mechanical all the time. I want to feel refreshed and inspired to exist outside of my mind. But my body and spirit needed rest. I needed to step away from that monotony before my spirit gave up. I'm trying to get back and push the little dung ball up the hill again but sometimes it feels like the dungball pushes against me. It really is all about perseverance. This flower reminds me of the simplicity of beauty and how it is okey to take step back while still mainting hope that everything will be better with time and that resting is necessary in a forms in order to bloom. Here are some images from yesterday. Hope you enjoy them as much as I did.
-Ale
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